Motorhome Australia with Us

17/02/07

The first thing i would suggest to budding motorhomers - Be Organised...

We left the quiet shores of Bilgola Beach in Sydney, all filled with the anticipation of an exciting road adventure.

The players on this road trip are myself Craig, my girl Tara, our kids Tayla who is 3, Arden who is 1 and our good friend Olivia who is 13 and made a special trip across the ditch to come play with us. Oh, and not forgetting my good little mate, Tom the 12 year old staffy, who is neither obedient or faithfull.

Im not the best organised kind of person, but i do get the program done. Even if somewhat chaotically. Tara and i were up till 4am on the morning of our departure, working out the actual route of our trip. Having had this tour of duty booked in for 3 months, and leaving the actual planning and organisation of it for the day of departure, you can probably understand why we may have started on the wrong foot...

Anyway , away in a bagel we go. Heat in back of camper is driving the team insane. and its amazing how quickly the whirring sounds of a diesel engine and the angels on the ipod can be drowned out by screaming kids, cranky women and a dog near death from heat exaustion. The overwhelming call was to "pull the f... over and fix the bloody airconditioning, or there will be one more shallow grave littering the highway of dreams.

So, we pit stop at the super servo, with Mcdonalds, lahdy dah latte cafes, specialist juice emporiums, health food havens for drive through wheat grass n tofu burgers on rye bricks called bread. Another tangent...

Back to the melting campers... Whilst the unhappy campers depart for the nearest airconditioned shop in the highway hypermarket, with the last of the energy reserves, i decide to contact head office with my very valid grievence. "Hi Craig here, just wondering why my camper is on high and we are all toasting inside. Its cooler for me to lay face down on the bitumen in the nude in the middle of the day here at the moment, than it is to cruise in the perceived comfort of our - air-conditioned motor palace." Sir have you turned the right buttons on for the aircon in the front panel?" Of bloody course i have, theres only 3 guages to press and adjust, and i have tried it every different combination. Do you think i look like a bloody tourist? No sir, but i had one fellow, just this morning actually who never pressed the actual aircon button on and had a similar complaint. But as your not a tourist sir, im sure its probably something else. Yeah me too. See you later.

Hows that, as soon as i hang up the line, a whole new button appears on the dash. It had a snow icon embedded into it. I swear it wasnt there before. Its a bit of fun for the staff at camper hire, as soon as someone rings complaining about the heat, they secretly and wirelessly connect to the dashboard - and "wally" theres a new button and heres a lather of egg for for your face.
Cant wait to see the next joke they try to pull on me. Im awake to their game.

Hey team, ive fixed the airconditioning, a hose had come of underneath, and i have repaired the problem. Yeahhhh dad, you are king. Thanks girls. Lets go... yes lets. Down the road aways, oh girls by the way, what did you bring back to eat from the super duper hyper service centre with everything under one corporate eco rapists fuel goliath?... You want some water dad?...

Just ipod the grief away with the future before me. Im full up already.

Ok team, lets find somewhere to stay. We'll go to Forster and stay at smugglers cove camping park. Yehhh. Sorry mate... no vacancy. But it says you have powered sites available? Oh we should change that. Ok girls theres another place down the road... sorry no vacancy. But it says you have a vacancy. Yes someone stole the no... yeah right mate.

Its getting dark, the team is now hungry, agitated and despondent of hope for refreshing their weary road muscles and minds. Hey heres a place, lets try them. Down the back roads we steam. yes sir, we have a powered site for you. So the girls and tom are on the rollercoaster and are now coming to a new peak of happiness and relief.

We set up camp, and i head for the shop in search of food. shop closed. I watched the happy organised campers all around enjoying their steaks n snags. But readers dont despair, the kidlettes did have food, just forgot about the adults.

We have a fridge , forgot to get food till we decided to camp. No shops open! I see fellow campers cooking bar-b-ques & recall the memory of burnt meat for sustenance.

So tomorrows a new day. Learnt a few lessons today, and i am sure we are now on the way to motoring enjoyment, with the worst behind us. And campers are a friendly happy bunch, so instead of thinking what might go awry tomorrow, im saying " what could be perfect today hey?" . A fresh new magnificent motoring adventure is all lined up for us tomorrow. So i'd better get some sleep, i cant wait. To sleep that is, the hunger pains are now driving me insane.

chow now!!!

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